Perimenopause: what it feels like, why stress makes it worse, and natural ways to feel better

Rachel Kloiber
1 hour ago
6 min read

Wow! We've come a long way. I remember in recent years that no one dare to mention the word peri-menopause or menopause. It was referred to as "the change" and was usually whispered. If you're wondering what's happening with your body and what to do, this article is for you. You're not crazy, you're not just getting older, there are things that you can do and you deserve to feel better!

Perimenopause is the transitional phase before menopause when your ovaries gradually make less estrogen and progesterone. That hormonal ebb-and-flow can last several years and cause a wide range of physical, mental, and emotional symptoms. Many women benefit from medical care (including HRT) — but there are also safe, evidence-backed lifestyle and complementary approaches that can reduce symptom severity and improve quality of life. Below is a practical, research-informed guide.

Common symptoms

Perimenopause symptoms vary widely but commonly include:

Irregular or heavier/lighter periods
Hot flashes and night sweats
Sleep disturbances and insomnia
Mood changes: anxiety, irritability, low mood, mood swings
Brain fog, difficulty concentrating, memory slips
Vaginal dryness, decreased libido
Joint aches, muscle stiffness, fatigue, weight gain
Headaches and increased migraine frequency

(These symptoms and their prevalence are summarized in clinical guidance and large surveys of perimenopausal people.)

How stress worsens perimenopause

Stress interacts with hormones and the nervous system in ways that can amplify menopausal symptoms. For example, research has shown rises in stress hormone (cortisol) levels around hot flashes and that higher cortisol is associated with more severe hot flashes. Chronic stress also disrupts sleep, increases inflammation, and can worsen mood symptoms — all common issues during perimenopause. Managing stress is therefore a key part of symptom control.

Natural, practical strategies to help balance hormones and reduce symptoms

1. Sleep and circadian hygiene

Better sleep helps hormonal regulation and mood. Keep a consistent bedtime/wake time, reduce evening screens, cool the bedroom to reduce night sweats, and prioritize 7–9 hours of quality sleep.

🌟Tip! Get 20 minutes of sunlight first thing in the morning to help balance circadian rhythms for a better night's sleep.

2. Move regularly (exercise + strength)

Gentle aerobic activity and resistance training support weight management, bone health, mood, and sleep. Even brisk walking, 30 minutes most days, helps. Exercise has been linked to improvements in perimenopausal symptoms in systematic reviews.

🌟Tip! Incorporate more gentle and slower workouts like yoga, qigong, paced weight lifting, walking, and pilates so that you don't disrupt your hormones (HIIT workouts, running and other rigorous workouts can make your body think that you are running away from the tiger and can work against you when trying to balance your hormones.)

3. Diet and nutrition

Focus on a whole-foods pattern: plenty of vegetables, fiber, lean protein, legumes, nuts, seeds, and whole grains.

Key points:

Maintain adequate calcium and vitamin D for bone health.
Include protein at each meal to preserve muscle mass.
Aim for steady blood sugar (small frequent meals or balanced plates) to reduce mood swings and energy crashes.

🌟Tip! Limit excessive alcohol and caffeine (both can worsen hot flashes and sleep).

5. Mind–body practices (yoga, sound baths, meditation, breathing)

Mind–body interventions reduce stress, improve sleep and mood, and have been shown in trials to reduce menopausal complaints. Yoga and sound baths can reduce somatic and psychological symptoms; mindfulness-based programs lower “bother” from hot flashes and improve coping. These practices lower sympathetic tone and may reduce cortisol spikes.

🌟Tip! Even 10 minutes of meditation or mindfulness can help to regulate your hormone levels and reduce stress.

6. Sleep, alcohol, and stimulants

Reduce evening alcohol and caffeine; both interfere with sleep and can worsen hot flashes and anxiety. Hydration and a cool environment at night help manage night sweats.

🌟Tip! Switch out alcohol with a non-alcohol adaptogen drink or Kombucha when socializing or to take the edge off.

Massage Therapy: how it can help and what the research says

Why Massage can help:

Massage stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system (rest-and-digest), which lowers heart rate, reduces perceived stress, and can decrease cortisol — helping anxiety, sleep, and muscle tension.
Massage can reduce pain, improve circulation, and improve sleep quality, all valuable during perimenopause.

What the evidence shows:

Randomized clinical trials have found that massage — and particularly aromatherapy massage — reduced menopausal symptoms (including sleep problems, mood, and somatic complaints) compared with control conditions. While studies vary in size and methods, several support massage as a useful complementary tool to ease menopausal complaints.

🌟Tip: Even short, regular sessions (professional or self-massage, plus home-care like warm baths and gentle stretching) can be beneficial. Consider aromatherapy (if you tolerate it) as some trials showed added benefit.

Reiki and energy-based therapies: possible benefits and evidence

Why it may help:

Reiki is a hands-on or hands-near practice that many people report as deeply relaxing; relaxation is linked to lower stress hormones and better sleep and mood.
By reducing stress and improving subjective well-being, Reiki may indirectly ease hot flashes, sleep disruption, and anxiety.

What the research says:

Emerging clinical studies have reported improvements in menopausal symptoms, sleep, and psychological complaints following Reiki interventions, including distant Reiki in some trials. The literature is still growing and sometimes small, but results are promising for symptom relief and improved quality of life. Reiki appears to be low-risk when provided by trained practitioners.

🌟Tip: Incorporate Reiki once a month as a complementary approach alongside lifestyle strategies and medical care. Track which symptoms improve (sleep, anxiety, hot flashes) and how long benefits last for you.

Other helpful self-care strategies

Mindfulness and meditation: strengthens coping, reduces hot-flash bother, and improves mood in clinical trials.
Breathing and relaxation exercises: paced breathing during a hot flash can reduce its intensity.
Pelvic floor and vaginal moisturization: for vaginal dryness and pelvic symptoms, use water-based lubricants and discuss local estrogen options with your clinician if needed.
Supplements: some people find relief with evidence-supported supplements and herbs. Always check with your clinician before starting herbs or phytoestrogens — they’re not right for everyone and can interact with medications.

When to consider medical care (and HRT)

If symptoms are severe, interfering with daily life, mood, sleep, or relationships, consult your healthcare provider. Don't let your doctor gaslight you! If they tell you there is nothing they can do, push back! If they refuse to support you with HRT then find another doctor. It's time we take our power back! Hormone replacement therapy (HRT) remains the most effective treatment for vasomotor symptoms (hot flashes) and often improves sleep and mood — but it’s not suitable for everyone and should be discussed with a clinician who knows your health history. Complementary approaches (massage, Reiki, yoga, mindfulness, diet) are best used alongside appropriate medical evaluation.

Quick action plan you can try this month

Start a nightly routine: cool bedroom, no screens 60 min before bed, 20–30 minutes of gentle yoga or stretching.
Add 20–30 minutes of moderate movement 3 to 4 times per week.
Try two 60–minute yoga or gentle-movement classes per week for 8–10 weeks and track sleep/mood changes.
Book one massage or Reiki session per month and note changes in sleep, hot flashes, and mood for two weeks after. (Many people notice improved sleep and reduced anxiety.) or try our Massage & Reiki bliss to enjoy both!
Review diet: prioritize protein, vegetables, reduce alcohol/caffeine, and keep a symptom-and-food diary for 2 weeks.
Attend a Sound Bath and note how you feel before and after the event. Take note of any changes over the next week or so to determine the benefits. Check out our upcoming sound baths here.

Final notes

Perimenopause affects everyone differently. The good news is that a combination of lifestyle changes, stress-management (yoga, sound baths, mindfulness, relaxation), supportive bodywork (massage), and complementary therapies (Reiki) can meaningfully reduce symptoms for many people. If your symptoms are severe or you’re concerned about depression or heavy bleeding, please seek medical assessment—there are safe and effective medical options in addition to the strategies above.

Selected sources

NHS: Menopause — symptoms.
Woods NF, et al., Cortisol and hot flashes studies (stress–hot flash connection).
Darsareh F., Effect of aromatherapy massage on menopausal symptoms (randomized trial).
Yeşil FH., Effect of Reiki application on menopausal symptoms (randomized/distant Reiki studies).
Erdélyi A., Nutrition in menopause review (dietary recommendations, vitamin D, calcium, protein).